Posts tagged ‘halo’



I may need an intervention. My efforts at avoiding a cult have only left me open to another dangerous obsession. Of course, I saw it coming, but I was unprepared for its dangerous allure. Gaming has become a very real vice for me.

This is not to say that I’m a hardcore gamer. My paltry gamerscore currently sits at 2,715 which barely rivals certain other, more dedicated folk. But there’s the rub, right there. That’s what sucked me in. Statistics. Sneaky, fiddly little statistics. Because that 2,715 isn’t just one number, but an aggregation of achievements that I’ve accrued in various games. Perhaps even that might not have sucked me in, but for a certain other game’s nefarious influence.

Halo 3 came out a little while back and has gone some way to consuming my spare time. The game obviously comes with its requisite 1000 available points for your gamerscore, but there’s more than that. There’s this. Every single game you ever play, listed, categorised, broken down, analysed, outlined and summarised.

So now, not only is gaming eating into my other hobbies, but gaming is eating into my gaming. Why play Zelda on the Wii if I will receive no points? Ace Attorney 3 on the DS (dutifully imported by Jackson) is at least holding my attention, due to the same delightfully ridiculous sense of humour that has run through the entire series.

And now, a segue.

Ace Attorney is a game about lawyers.

Now I am talking about lawyers.

We had some lawyers come to talk to us at work, and sitting across the table from them made me realise just what a whacked out view of them I really have, courtesy of David E. Kelley. I was constantly disappointed as they failed to sing, dance, engage in witty repartee, have affairs with each other, pour the water in a slow trickle, announce their name and say nothing more, or just admire the skin underneath women’s jaws.

Must try harder, lawyers. You’re being left behind by fiction.

Posted by Tom Charman to , , , , | Comments Off on Playtime

Halo Halo I don’t know why I say Halo

The upcoming Halo movie got itself a new director recently, but lost a script. My hit-sensing senses are still wavering. There’s no reason why a Halo film shouldn’t rock to high heaven but people screw things up all the time. Let’s look at the history of the project.

Way back in June last year, Microsoft sent out scripts to studios, carried by men in Master Chief outfits. Classy, huh? Many folk were not keen on the script, but Universal picked it up anyway. It’s unclear whether there were giant spiders in it but you can probably find the script online. I mean, I could have, but I found a bunch of links already. What do you want from me? The Wikipedia page on all this is way more informative than this post. Why do I even bother?

Ahem. Sorry. Sometimes it just gets to me, y’know?

Anyhow, things got way way way cooler when it was announched that Peter Jackson and Fran Walsh would be producing. I’ve gone on record against their insatiable addiction to slow motion and unhealthy Warg obsession. But hey, a bit of slow mo would suit Halo to the ground. Also, Weta will be doing the effects. Say “From the Makers of The Lord of the Rings,” push the adventure aspects and some cool shots from Weta and you’ve got a hit.

But then they go and change the script, in the sense that they drop the old one and get someone to write a new one. This could be an improvement, but I get nervous when scripts get switched and sorted on big films. Before you know it you’ve got seven people writing it and touch-ups from Joss Whedon and Tom Stoppard. Where’s your artistic vision then? Hmmmm?

And today the director was announced. His name is Neill Blomkamp and he hasn’t actually made a motion picture before, BUT amongst other things he made a short sci-fi film called Alive in Joburg, which you can download here (77mb). It’s pretty cute and has quite a Halo-ish sensibility about how it treats its aliens. He also made that cool Citroen commercial with the dancing transforming car. So this is probably good news too. For one thing, he’s not Uwe Boll.

The way I see it, this film has the chance to be the best sci-fi action film in the history of everything. No pressure.

Oh, and Denzel might be the Chief.

Posted by Tom Charman to , , | 2 Comments »

Jackson talks Halo

No, no, not that Jackson. This one. Peter Jackson was interviewed recently by Paul Fischer about the upcoming Halo film (which he’s producing) and gave some really straightforward replies:

Question: You’re still producing Halo?
Jackson: Yeah.
Question: What attracted you to Halo?
Jackson: I’m a fan of the game.
Question: But video game movies suck.
Jackson: They do.
Question: So what will be different?
Jackson: Hopefully it won’t suck.
Question: But why not direct?
Jackson: I want a break. I want to have the fun but not the hard work. I just want to be part of the creative team but not actually have the pain.

He may have screwed up The Return of the King, but he’s a good apple. I feel reasonably confident that a Halo film with him involved will rock considerably. Mind you, I’ve chosen not to read the (well received) leaked script. Some people out there probably know whether it’ll suck or not. But not me.

Oh, and just a quick mention that there’s an X-Men 3 trailer out. It’s… loud and impressive looking, but there’s not much hint at plot. Ah, it’s useless to try and work things out from trailers sometimes. I’ll just wait patiently.

Posted by Tom Charman to , , , | Comments Off on Jackson talks Halo