Office Space
Here’s a picture of my desk at work. On the left is our printer that rarely works. To my right is a VoiP phone that remembers it’s mine even when it strays. Irritatingly, to access messages you don’t press the ‘message’ button, oh no, you press ‘6’ and then ‘1’ and then enter your PIN. Duh! My desk also contains sugar and stirring sticks for when people bring me unsugared coffee, in and out trays, and a usually empty biscuit jar. The picture is crummy because it was taken with my new phone’s camera, which is crummy. I don’t mind; I don’t take many pictures.
Things are busy round the grapefruit offices these days. We’re all racking our brains to come up with a new name for the site. The incorrect plural is really getting to me. But it seems almost every word in the english language has been taken, so we’ve either got to make one up or combine a few existing ones. Words implying that the website is inaccurate, wildly irrelevant and generally silly would be favoured. If anyone has any ideas go ahead and post them. Whoever comes up with the best gets to have come up with the best.
I’m giving up on ER, I reckon. This season’s premiere was piss-poor. House is way better. At least some of the doctors on that seem skilled. ER lacks a super-doctor, and has since Green died, really. Carter almost had the stripes but his smug air and irritating grin got in the way. I can’t pin exactly when I lost all respect for him but the part where he screwed up his relationship with the hot hot hot Hospital counsellor might have been it. Or when he screwed up his relationship with Abby. I like Abby but she’s not quite enough to get me to watch.
306
Tom
February 24th, 2005 at 5:42 pm
Damn those apostrophes. I’ll fix them when I get home. And I’ll delete this part of the comment too.
While Jennifer Aniston being in a film is kind of a worry, Gary Cole is a plus. He’s a funny guy, and the only reason I was sad that Crusade got the axe.
ben
February 16th, 2006 at 7:22 pm
you need to start watching prison break. I can help you out with the first 8 episodes.
Tom
February 17th, 2006 at 6:14 am
Maybe. I still haven’t caught up with Battlestar Galactica or Veronica Mars yet though.
I’ve been looking at Grapefruit replacement names. Some options are:
aphoristica.com
irredeemable.net or .org
unseemly.net
inapplicable.net
ben
February 17th, 2006 at 7:36 am
im/in/unplausible.org ?
disinapropriatly.net ?
Tom
February 17th, 2006 at 7:50 am
Unfortunately, implausible.org has been taken, as have a bunch of websites. I was momentarily thrilled when I thought of aproposofnothing.com but it’s been taken too, in .net, .org and .com forms. Even more irritatingly, most of them have been taken by those shitty websites that don’t actually appear to do anything, or be run by anyone, like this one.
I’m sure there’s a good explanation for these websites but I can’t think of it.
hayko
February 18th, 2006 at 7:18 am
Then I have the perfect name: Pampelmusen
It is the plural of the german translation, plus the word “muse” is in it.
I would now like to receive my prize.
Btw, what is sooo wrong with a wrong plural. I love grapefruits. It’s in my head now and that’s what I associate with it.
ben
February 18th, 2006 at 8:42 am
antidisestablishmentarianism.org/.net is available.
.com isnt, however. its a rather amusing site, nonetheless.
Tom
February 18th, 2006 at 4:53 pm
The problem is that the plural of grapefruit is grapefruit. Grapefruits isn’t a word. It bugs me. If grapefruit.org or whatever was available I’d get that but it’s not.
Pampelmusen is oddly tempting. I’ll put it on the list.
Ben, that word is too long — in fact, if I remember correctly, it is or was the longest word in the dictionary. People will have fallen asleep before I manage to tell them the name of my site.
Tom
February 19th, 2006 at 7:03 am
Since you’re all presumably very interested, I’ll let you know some other ideas we had. A movie cliche seemed like a good idea:
halftruth.net
mostlydead.net/.org
electromagneticpulse.org/.net
killthemall.net
killthemkillthemall.com
since-youre-all-going-to-die-anyway.com
myevilplan.net/.org
inevitableconclusion.com
senselesswaste.com
Of these, since-youre-all-going-to-die-anyway.com is both my favourite and far far too long. Another idea:
yourinevitabledoom.com or
inevitabledoom.com orcertaindoom.com (or for that matter, certaindoob.com, not that many people will get that joke).
ben
February 19th, 2006 at 9:06 am
shoephone.org
Andy
February 19th, 2006 at 4:14 pm
Off the top of my head: Capricompanion.com
Tom
February 19th, 2006 at 5:22 pm
Jackson and I really like certaindoom.net. We’ve slept on it and we still like it. Thoughts?
andy
February 19th, 2006 at 10:05 pm
finalsolution.com ?hahahaha.com ?
Tom
February 19th, 2006 at 10:56 pm
I’m not touching finalsolution.com. Hahahaha isn’t very eloquent. I’ll just shout down all your ideas.
Andy
February 20th, 2006 at 6:07 pm
Perhaps part of one of these Pinky and the Brain quotes:Are you pondering what I’m pondering? Gee, Brain, what are we going to do tonight?The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world!
like areyoupondering.com or takeovertheworld.com or samethingwedoeverynight.com
Jess
February 20th, 2006 at 6:44 pm
I like certaindoom.net but areyoupondering.com just rocks! Who wouldn’t love a Pinky and the Brain inspired website?
goes back into lurkdom
andy
February 20th, 2006 at 8:52 pm
opinionistas.comlurkdom.comwhatsthmatrix.comimsickofmakingupwebsites.com
ben
February 20th, 2006 at 9:39 pm
ireallydoseedeadpeople.com
andy
February 20th, 2006 at 9:54 pm
opinionninjas.comtouchme.comosxsux.xxx
Tom
February 20th, 2006 at 10:21 pm
I don’t feel you’re being quite serious any more, Andy.
andy
February 20th, 2006 at 10:52 pm
Not all of my suggestions are serious. I’ve been having a dull day. Obviously we can’t have osxsux.xxx because the .xxx domain hasn’t been approved yet. Touchme.com was DS inspired so I didn’t think you’d go for it. finalsolution.com is racist, so no. Whatsthmatrix.com you’ll be surprised to learn is actually a rip off of a website about The Matrix.
I like the sound of opinionninjas or opinionpirates. Say them aloud a few times and they’ll grow on you.
Tom
February 21st, 2006 at 12:31 am
A few more ideas from my train trip:
Tom
February 21st, 2006 at 9:46 am
Or:
andy
February 21st, 2006 at 5:52 pm
mildthemes.com is good
I don’t like internet acronyms but in a forum post asking for medical advice everyone prefacing their reply with IANAD had me amused. Which leads me to ianad.com
Jess
February 21st, 2006 at 11:53 pm
godamongstinsects.com…i think its available…though I doubt any of you know why I like it :P
andy
February 22nd, 2006 at 4:22 pm
I don’t need Google powers to spot the x-men connection. I think it’s taken though. Link and google cache
ianal.com Make your own rude jokes about lawyers and that acronym.
inthecrowd.com kissingstrangers.com
hayko
February 22nd, 2006 at 9:26 pm
luckysspeech.com – remember him / it?
mostly-harmless.net – or some sort of variation that isn’t already taken like .com, no dash, etc
kauderwelsch.org is also nice.
PS: Still haven’t read your paper on dashes, tom, sorry.
Tom
February 22nd, 2006 at 9:48 pm
There’s no untaken org, net or com version of Mostly Harmless, unsurprisingly. And sadly, that would be a cool name.
Some sort of Waiting for Godot quote could be cool:
I like idlediscourse. Or there might be another variation or bad pun on ‘discourse’ out there.
Andy
February 22nd, 2006 at 10:22 pm
Do you have fluorescent lights at your work? We have them here and I don’t like them.
Tom
February 22nd, 2006 at 10:24 pm
I should point out that idle-discourse.com isn’t taken. Samuel Beckett is a veritable font of good but obscure quotes. Thank you, Hayko!
Tom
February 22nd, 2006 at 10:54 pm
We do but they’re behind some sort of glass (or plastic) that makes the light a bit more diffuse. They’re also inset into the ceiling which looks neater and means you don’t see them normally, you just get their light.
Shannon
February 22nd, 2006 at 11:38 pm
I notice all the ones with we came up with at my house have been ignored.
What was wrong with punctilious.com?
I like mildthemes.com but I don’t think I could ever visit the site again seeing as the “minor themes” label on film ratings is my biggest pet peeve in life. Worse than nails on chalkboard, worse than girls bitching behind you back, the lot. So F*ing stupid and irritating. Ahem.
Shannon
February 22nd, 2006 at 11:46 pm
sententious.org?
lanfoftheerudites.com?
mellowdramatic.net? (yes i can spell, its a pun)
expository.net ?