Good to see we are all keeping this terrorism thing in perspective. Our wise leaders are taking the sensible steps of removing our freedoms and infringing on our rights to ensure these evil jihadists can never succeed in the aim of destroying Western civilisation and its fundamental tenets — the freedoms and rights of the individual… Extreme caution is also key – as evidenced by the need to assume that any white powder is most likely anthrax rather than say, flour, sugar or salt.

Last night a Sydney to Los Angeles plane was 90 minutes into its flight when there was a terrorist scare. Understandably emergency procedures were put in place, all flights in and out of Sydney were cancelled or redirected causing massive delays and the plane returned where it was surrounded and fully searched. So what was the nature of the threat? Initial reports claimed that someone had tried to storm the cockpit. Clearly a serious threat, but not what actually happened. It was then revealed that someone had made a bomb threat. So what was the nature of the threat? Apparently a message had been found written on a sick bag. OK… chances are such a message is a hoax, but as politicians like saying, since 9/11 we live in a different world and such threats have to be taken seriously. If I was on a flight where a note saying “There is a bomb on this plane” had been found, I would probably want to get of it ASAP. But it turns out that is not what the message said. So what was the sinister note?

“B O B”

Now, call me cavalier, but those three letters don’t immediately scream bomb threat to me. Apparently the flight’s crew took them to stand for “Bomb on Board”. Clearly that is one possible interpretation, however it is far from unique as Acronym Finder will tell you. Of the 48 expressions it says BOB can stand for are: Bolivian Boliviano (the currency of, you guess it, Bolivia), Bring Own Booze, Big Orange Ball (slang for the sun) and Bend Over Buddy, but no Bomb on Board. However there is another possible explanation. Acronym Finder also told me that BOB can apparently be an abbreviation for Robert, a fairly common name amongst the goodies in this “Battle of Civilisations”. Perhaps this bag belonged to Bobby who feeling unwell and not wanting to be caught without a vessel in which to vomit should the need arise claimed a sick bag for his own use and to mark it as his property, wrote his name on it. Such unthinking behaviour is clearly completely unacceptable in this new world – I might go so far as to so un-Australian/American. No doubt these were the actions of a Frenchman, most likely going by the name of Robért.

So let this be a lesson to us all. I can assure you that you want hear about a flight I am on board making an emergency landing after being suspected of carrying A Nuclear Device, Rifles, Explosives and Weapons.

529

This entry was posted by the illustrious Andrew Coulthurst on Wednesday, July 28th, 2004. It concerns such pressing issues as . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.